Republicans on Right vs. Wrong

Watching GOP lawmakers during the impeachment hearings has led me to wonder how they decide what is acceptable behavior for an American president. To resolve this question, I invited key GOP members of the House along with Senator Marco Rubio to the Sandspur Café, my local watering hole. I was pleased to see not only Senator Rubio, but Congressmen Will Hurd, Jim Jordan, and Devin Nunes trickle into the café and seat themselves at my table. Once we were all comfortably seated and provided with libations, I plunged immediately into the questions at hand. 

Me: Okay, so President Trump held back vital military aid from the Ukrainians, while the Russians attacked them, and then demanded a quid pro quo: Ukraine’s President Zelensky had to announce an investigation into Hunter Biden’s activities and also had to look into Ukrainian interference in the 2016 election. Now, do you all agree that he was wrong to do this?

Devin Nunes: No.

Marco Rubio: Of course not.

Jim Jordan slams his fist on the table and spits aggressively on the café floor.

Me: I’ll take that as a “No.” What do you think Congressman Hurd?

Will Hurd: Well, what President Trump did was wrong, but it doesn’t warrant impeachment.

Jordan: Okay, wait a minute. We’re going to have to caucus out back for a minute. Let’s go, Hurd.

They walk out the backdoor of the café and, after a few minutes during which loud thuds and the crashing of trash barrels can be heard, Jordan, Nunes, and Rubio re-enter and sit down.

Jordan (blowing softly on his chafed knuckles): It’s unanimous. We all agree the president did nothing wrong.

Me: What about Congressman Hurd?

Rubio: He’s indisposed right now.

Nunes: Why do you witch-hunting media types keep trying to make President Trump look bad? In the meantime, you just let the Ukrainians get away with interfering in our elections.

Me: But the Ukrainians never interfered in our elections. The Russians did.

Nunes: Says who?

Me: Says Robert Mueller, the CIA, and all the other U.S. intelligence agencies.

Nunes: What do they know? Putin says Ukraine interfered in our election and he is very strong when he says it.

Me: But…Okay, never mind. I’d just like to know what you think about Trump’s actions. He withheld military equipment from our Ukrainian allies in order to promote his own personal interests. What does this say about the future? You may set a precedent here that allows other presidents to turn U.S. policy into private instruments of personal power, you know, like Idi Amin did in Uganda, or Ferdinand Marcos in the Philippines. Aren’t you at all worried about what future presidents may try to get away with?

Jordan: Well, the good ones are held to a different standard. They should be able to do whatever the hell they want.

Me: Which ones are the good ones?

Jordan: The white guys who give big tax breaks to millionaires.

Rubio (looking dreamily off into space): And, also the Cuban ones…

Me: But think about Lend Lease during World War II. Britain desperately needed ships to save it from Nazi submarine attacks. Would it have been okay for Franklin Roosevelt to say to Winston Churchill, “You can have the ships only after you slander one of my political opponents”?

Nunes: I don’t know. Was Franklin Roosevelt a Republican?

Jordan: Enough of your media-type “gotcha” questions. President Trump can do what he wants to the Ukrainians because he’s a stable genius and he is making America great again!

Nunes: Yeah. Duh.

Jordan: Let's go Nunes!

Meanwhile, Senator Rubio just sat silently looking dreamily off into space.
 

                            Photo: From Orlando Weekly

And so ended my search for the Republicans' sense of right and wrong.

Crisis in the Offing

The stink bomb that is the Trump presidency should have as its motto “Thanks for the votes, suckers!”

“Aha!” you say, “because of the tax cut for billionaires!” Yes, but for so many other reasons as well. Anyway, let’s start today’s tour de farce with a glance at that tax bill. This bill is one of those Congressional actions that makes ordinarily cynical people say, “Good God, I haven’t been nearly cynical enough!” Or, as the venerable Onion put it, “GOP Leaders Celebrate Decisive Win Over Americans.”

If Paul Ryan and Mitch McConnell were normal human beings with normal standards of honesty they would have put forward their tax plan with these words: “We want to cut taxes for corporations and rich people because they pay for our campaigns. We will throw a few temporary cuts to some middle-class Americans hoping they will let us get away with this, even though they and their children will have to pay for the 1.5 trillion dollars we are borrowing to fund our bribes to our wealthy donors. Of course, middle-class insurance premiums will go up, but maybe voters will forget that our tax plan caused that. Now, if our rich corporate friends will only give us a boost here by suddenly showering their employees with hundreds of dollars (from the billions the taxpayers are giving them), that would help us cover up our scam. In the meantime, thanks for the votes, suckers!”

But such honesty is alien to the likes of Ryan and McConnell. However, Dear Reader, please don’t refer to Washington as a Swamp, because any ordinary, self-respecting swamp would recoil in horror and disgust at the rank and slithery morass that is today’s Republican Congress. But I digress.

The other gross blunder committed by Trump and his enablers last week was the follow-up to a previous gross blunder: the promise to move America’s Embassy in Israel from Tel Aviv to Jerusalem. This incredibly stupid and provocative gesture resulted in a UN vote of condemnation that was supported by almost all of America’s erstwhile allies – including Britain, Germany, Japan, and France.

The Trump administration should have accepted that the UN vote was a rational reaction its own blunder - a blunder which, by the way, further undermined America’s already shrinking influence in the world. But instead of quietly accepting the vote of condemnation, the Trump administration reacted with the belligerent anger of a common street thug. America's UN Ambassador, Nikki Haley, promised that she was taking the names of those countries that hurt Trump’s feelings by criticizing him, and that they would pay.

Even worse than the tax cuts for the rich and Nikki Haley’s thuggishness were the attacks that various Republicans have begun to level at the FBI. 
Orchestrated by the Stink Bomb White House and in close coordination with propagandists at Fox News, Congressmen like Devin Nunes (R - CA) and Jim Jordan (R - Ohio) are trying to make Americans distrust the FBI and Special Counsel Robert Mueller. Obviously, what they want to do is weaken Robert Mueller so that Trump will be able to eliminate him and wipe out the Russia investigation. Trump wants to eliminate Mueller because the special counsel is all but certain to reveal very damaging information about the corrupt behavior of Donald Trump and/or his family.

Here’s what Republican Congressman Jim Jordan said about the FBI last week: “Everything points to the fact that there was an orchestrated plan to try to prevent Donald Trump from being the next president of the United States.”

Yes, Jordan actually claims that the FBI, under the direction of James Comey, was trying to get Hillary Clinton elected. Can you get your head around that? Probably not, if you’re a normal American patriot. Well, MSNBC host and normal, patriotic American Nicolle Wallace can’t. Here’s what she had to say about her fellow Republicans:

“I can’t get my brain around the insurrection in the Republican Party against Republican-led law enforcement agencies. I can’t shove the round pegs into the square boxes. It’s making me crazy.”

It’s making a lot of us crazy, Ms. Wallace, and it’s going to make the entire country crazy next year if Trump orders Mueller fired and Congressional Republicans support him. There will be crowds in the streets, lots of them and for a long time, I guarantee you.

I believe Trump will have Mueller fired because that’s the kind of person Trump is: crude, bullying, and unconcerned with anything but his own sorry hide. If we had enough decent, patriotic Republicans in Congress to stop Trump from doing this or, at least to replace Mueller with an equally dedicated and competent investigator once he is fired, the country would be fine. But look at the recent behavior of GOP politicians. What do you think?

                           (Photo from Salon)